Discord Server

Over the past few years we have built a community of ABDLs and their spouses who are looking to discover their own self-acceptance as well as help each other in their journeys as well.

Request an invite to the Discord server by connecting with me over Twitter, Instagram, or Email.

Code of Conduct


This Discord server was originally created to serve the ABDL community as a safe place to talk about what can be a socially and religiously isolating topic: being ABDL while being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. 

While we invite members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to participate here, we also welcome others with similar desires and backgrounds who are looking to balance faith, family, and the affinity to wear diapers as part of their life for various reasons.  We want to be our best selves whether we are wearing a diaper, or not.

By participating on this server, you acknowledge and agree to abide by this code of conduct. This document will likely be updated over time, and continued abidance of the rules and guidelines for the server will be expected.

Ground Rules 

1. We welcome people from across the ABDL spectrum. All ABDL participants (spouses are exempted from this requirement) are welcomed and encouraged to create and maintain an accurate, honest profile in #whos-who, generally following the outline provided, though no individual question is required.  This helps us make connections with others in the community.  Often people will reach out after seeing similarities in their lives with other members.

2. We treat each other as children of our Heavenly Father. We are polite. We are kind. We are supportive. We welcome and encourage the diversity of the members of our server.  We ask that when you post you refrain from being overbearing in your comments in a way that detracts from the spirit of the conversation.  We welcome healthy conversation on both sides of a question.  Should you present an alternative to a discussion please do so in a way that is non-judgemental.  Do not feel that you have to water down your comments, but also stay within the bounds of civil discourse.  (2 Peter 1:7)

3. We keep private things private. What happens here stays here. Like a good “Anonymous” meeting, we show, in word and action, absolute trust in each other. We only share other’s experiences outside of this server with specific permission. We are people-builders who would never knowingly hurt any member of the server in any way. (1 Thess. 4:9)

4. We respect anonymity. We support an individual’s inherent right to privacy. We do not attempt to “figure out” people’s real identity or other personal information that they don’t freely share. If we discover that information, or that information is shared with us, we keep it private.  Doxxing will not be tolerated, and will result in removal from the server.

5. When we contact other members of this server via DM (Direct Messages), we abide by these same principles. We avoid oversharing or bothering people with excessive messages. We ensure our messages are appropriate, and we only communicate in ways that encourage others to feel comfortable.  Any inappropriate activity in public channels or DMs should be reported to the @moderator team.

6. We only post appropriate media. We allow pictures of stashes and new diapers, but we don’t allow pictures of used diapers or pictures of people wearing visible diapers, including diaper selfies. We respect copyright law. We don’t spam the server. 

7. All content is PG-13 or under. We maintain an appropriate (within the scope of this topic) tone, including our choice of words, in discussions of intimate matters, or in media posted to the server. We avoid graphic, suggestive, or titillating content. Appropriate discussions of marital topics is welcomed in #couples-chat. If you are married, you may need to ask a moderator to be added to this channel. 

8. We support faith. We follow the golden rule in treating each other as we would like to be treated, especially in regards to our individual faith journeys. We build each other. We protect each other from attacks or other attempts to diminish faith or demean religious practices or beliefs. In particular, we don’t post any content that speaks against, or is not in harmony with, the principles taught by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We do not discuss sacred topics, such as specifics about the temple ceremony.

9. We foster good discussion. We recognize that our members have a wide variety of views of controversial subjects such as current events, vaccines, politics, and (of course) BYU football. We generally avoid contentious topics, but when we read opinions different than our own, we respond with tolerance and mutual respect. 

Conduct Enforcement

Nobody wants to be the content police, yet every member deserves to feel safe in our community. Therefore, any content that violates our code of conduct will be removed by a moderator. When a moderator removes content, they reach out privately to the member who posted to explain which rule was violated, and why the content was removed. 

While we want everybody to participate, repeated violations diminish the value of the server for other participants, and will not be tolerated. If corrective action is not followed, the moderator reserves the right to permanently ban individuals. For extreme violations the moderator reserves the right to permanently ban individuals without prior warning.

Reporting Inappropriate Activity/Conduct

A voluntary committee has been assembled to help any content moderation or enforcement that may need to occur on the server.  The committee will also accept server change requests for channels and features.  

To report or request something to the @moderators team please tag us in a conversation or DM @aberrantlyme so we can capture the information for evaluation.  

The mission and goal of the @moderators team is to make the server the best experience possible for everyone.  We’ve got your back!

Warning/Offense policy

The @moderators will leverage the following guidelines for content moderation and code enforcement.  Warnings/Offenses will be given based on the determination of the @moderators, and are not meant to be a permanent mark on any member.  Warnings/Offenses will be held on a rolling 12-month cycle unless otherwise determined by the @moderators.  

The framework upon which warnings/offenses will be given will result in the following (this can be modified to fit the need of the situation as determined by the @moderators)

Warning/Offense 1 – Warning issued by the @moderators with an explanation

Warning/Offense 2 – User will be notified they are being put in “time out” (Discord’s term, which is conveniently appropriate) for a time determined by the @moderators (likely between 1-7 days)

Warning/Offense 3 – The user will be removed from the server.

Again, we appreciate the diversity that our community offers.  We want everyone to have a place here because we truly are better together as we learn and grow from the experiences of others.  The intent of this policy is to protect the integrity and purpose of the community while empowering people to share their unique perspective.

#whos-who (Template)

Trust is a critical component in our community. One way we foster trust is by sharing a little bit about ourselves in our #whos-who channel. As part of our Code of Conduct, we encourage members to create and maintain an accurate and honest profile in #whos-who. We invite you to use the information in this document as an outline. You don’t have to answer any individual question, nor do you have to be more specific than you are comfortable with, but we do expect all answers to be honest. 

To keep the channel clean, we don’t allow responses to a post in #whos-who. Please make those comments/questions in another, appropriate channel.

You can copy and paste the following template into the #whos-who channel, and adapt it to meet your needs. Please be aware, there is a character limit to posts (around 2700, if you are counting), so you won’t be able to answer all questions with great depth. Each account may only have one post in #whos-who.

#whos-who Template

Age: [can be specific (e.g. 29) or range (e.g. 30’s or early 50s)]


Marital Status and Family Situation:



Games: [Board Games, Card Games, Video Games, etc. We have a lot of gamers, so there is interest in this particular area.]

Favorite Color:

History in diapers:

ABDL scale: [1 = only DL <to> 10 = only AB (the scale is really arbitrary, more just a place for you to express where you feel you are on the ABDL spectrum)]

Frequency of Wearing: [e.g. never, seldom, 24/7, medical, stress-wearer, coping mechanism, etc.]

Level of support from your Spouse: [if not married, omit]

Do you wear in public:

Favorite Diaper/s:

Church:  [Callings or interests you’d like to share, missionary service]

Your ABDL Blogs/Social Media Profiles: [e.g. ADisc, Twitter, Instagram etc.]
Other information you’d like to share: [What did we forget to ask that we should have? Just help us get to know you better by sharing whatever you feel would help us get acquainted.]

#meet-up Guidelines and Tips

Coming soon..

Channels and Roles (WIP)

ABDL (role): Adult Baby and/or Diaper Lover

  • Access granted to the #abdl-only (channel) that is meant for discussion surrounding aspects of ABDL that members would like to discuss outside the view of their spouses/loved ones that are also on the server.

Couples (role): Married Adult Baby and/or Diaper Lover and their spouse or loved one

  • Access granted to the #couples (channel) that is meant for discussion surrounding aspects of marriage where at least one of the relationship is an ABDL

#diapers (channel): A channel for discussion around the various brands, styles, and shells of adult diapers available.  Share your favorite ones, ask a question about wearing, and help others as they navigate wearing the various diapers available to us.

#family-and-friends (channel):

#gaming (channel):

#general (channel): The landing zone for the littles making their way onto the server.  Generalized discussion and comments get dropped here.

#humor (channel):  A requested channel for memes, GIFs, and other humorous items.

#meet-up (channel):  Where our members discuss when and where the next meet up.  Please refer to our “#meet-up Guidelines and Tips” for some pointers on making your meet up safe and enjoyable for everyone involved.


Spouse (role): #spouse-support (channel)



Unicorns (role): #unicorns (channel)