During a follow up part of our conversation my wife shared that she might understand a little bit about what diapers do for me through her enjoyment of massages. My wife works in a high-stress environment and has a standing monthly massage that can be more frequent if she needs them. She related to me that perhaps diapers do for me what massages do for her. It is such a huge win to draw a parallel that is relatable with your spouse. Her emotional connection with her massages will help her gain some understanding with my connection and response to diapers.
On my end massages, coupled with things like manicure and pedicures, have always been something that eluded me. I don’t understand their value to her. I have worked to understand that they are important to her, and support her in her wanting to experience them. This is more of a gender difference with manicures and pedicures, but the powerful connection to me was that my disconnect with her needing these things is similar to her disconnect to me in diapers. We connected with each other in two different ways with her sharing the parallel of her and massages.
Her previous conversation about control could be paralleled as well with massages. Do massages control her? I do not believe so. Massages, pedicures, and manicures afford her a moment of disconnect and relaxation from her life. They allow her to escape, even if for a small moment, from the stressors that are ever-present in her personal and professional life. Myself, and other ABDLs, describe those same things when we explain the effect that wearing a diaper, or feeling “little,” has on us.