Recently on our Discord Server (message me if you’d like an invite) someone who goes by the name sirdinosaur1104 posed the question about goals regarding our significant others. While people chimed in I saw pieces of their answers in my own life. I think there are “mile markers” or significant milestones along the road that we are on, and while everyone’s journey will be as unique as they are we will find common ground in the steps that we take.
Here are some of their messages, and my thoughts:
“Without hurting us financially” – I never wanted diapers to hurt my family in any way, and financial impact was one of those worries. Discretionary income is different for everyone, and while diapers serve a real and powerful purpose to many of us they are definitely higher up on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. We never want our desire to wear diapers to negatively impact the other parts of our life.
“Acceptance, support, and compassion for my need to wear” – A large desire to share diapers with our loved ones is to seek acceptance and understanding. We wear the burden alone, and this can become a very dangerous and slippery slope. If we are unable to find a healthy path toward self-acceptance alone it will often become a destructive one.
“Supportive of when I choose to wear my diapers” – That acceptance comes with comfort from your significant other in support when you feel the need to wear. I have felt the various levels of support here, and I feel it is on my side at this point. My future growth here is my own comfort with wearing around my wife. Exposing myself to her in that way. She has come a long way, and now gives me the support I need to wear. The following comment is a real concern that occurs when working through this part of our journey.
“I want her to understand than when and why I wear has nothing to do with her and doesn’t mean I’m choosing an inanimate object over her when I’m feeling stressed.” – Many loved ones feel that diapers are taking the place of part of them. They feel that they are unable to help us fill a void of need. Each of us must connect with our spouses to help them understand that diapers are not taking their place, but another tool for us to live our own healthy and balanced life.
“I wouldn’t mind if she helped me pick out my diapers” – This comment makes me smile. In the “big three” of my life I have felt this desire. The connection and ability for our loved ones to interact with us and diapers in this way helps us feel an additional level of acceptance. When they are willing to have these conversations with us we can feel they accept diapers as part of us in a more intimate way. While this seems like a small and insignificant thing, it is a huge thing to me.
‘Fantasies, that will never become realities” & “the blue moon treat of my wife indulging me” & “my wife wearing with me” – In our minds, we grow up for years (sometimes decades) with having internal conversations about diapers. During these conversations we will fantasize of what the perfect life in diapers would be like, and that includes the companionship and acceptance of our spouse. Many of the other quotes relate to acceptance, but this aspect specifically dials in on intimacy with a significant other with diapers. I would place this very far down the road, for my own journey at least. I would pair this comment with the following one as well.
“I would prefer in my little headspace would be me being taken care of by an adult” – For some ABDLs they enjoy “little space.” These Adult Babies seek for companionship and the connection of a caregiver. This is often not intimate or sexual in nature. It is more nested in the desire for the reception of love, compassion, and care while wearing a diaper and being in a mental state of regression. This often happens farther down the acceptance and incorporation journey for a Little, Adult Baby, or Diaper Lover.
I appreciate each and everyone of the people that choose to share part of themselves on our Discord Server. I learn from them, and they help me become a better spouse and Adult Baby.
Wherever you are on the path of self acceptance or seeking the acceptance of your spouse, hang in there. Both paths are very hard, with a spectrum of emotions. Hang in there, and seek help from others. We are out there, and want to help you on your own path.