A few nights ago I was helping my youngest son with his spelling list for the week. He, like many six year old boys, has a very quick style of writing that sometimes resembles the English language. More than the way to spell the words I worked with him on focusing on how we wrote the words. He was less than thrilled about this activity because I’m sure there are so many other things that are more important in life to my son. Instead of getting through the words once, we ended up working through the list three or four times. After finishing the list and seeing the drastic improvement in his work I congratulated him on his effort, and went on my way with my next task.
Later that evening I found that he had cut out the words he had written, showed them off to his mom, and then put them in his room. He was proud of his effort. An effort that at first he was dreading completion of. It made me smile to see how happy he was with something that he had done. Something that was really a little thing, but was a pretty big deal to him.
There are times that we lose sight of the “why” behind what we do. Sometimes, when diapered, I will glance at myself in the mirror and melt. I will be so overcome with shame for what I see. So many questions come to my mind, and I will stand there and beat myself up. In those moments I lose my “why.” It has taken me decades to get to where I am, and I still struggle with the fact that I want to wear diapers.
Like my son, we need to look for the moments where we are proud of who we are (the person we resolve to be). We may know how to write a series of letters, sometimes more sloppy than other times, but we must remember the “why” behind what we are doing. He felt pride in his effort, and learned to write a little bit better that day. It is not easy. In fact, I struggle with my affinity for diapers more than I’d like to admit.
Search for your “why.” Leverage those around you in this amazing community to help you. Reach out to me if you need someone to talk to. We can be stronger and better together, even while wearing diapers.